Betrayal

Image

I leave the room for one second

and I come back to see your cock slamming into her.

You definitely weren’t thinking about me. Selfish, greedy pig!

To make things worse.

You defended her feeble excuses, tried to twist it around and make it my fault, then you left – with her.

Somehow I’m a user. A psychopath with no friends? Go figure.

You were such a disappointment. Still are.

I see your cock inside her, thrusting hard and I can’t bare to touch you or trust.

Betrayal was never a part of us or what we had. ‘I hope you’re happy now’, was another thing you said.

It’s a waiting game from here on in, till we say goodbye and start again.

It was over before it began really. I knew deep down already, you were just too good to be true. Part of me kept hoping but it’s too late for me now.

I’ll do all my grieving before we say goodbye, so I dont have to think about you then. It won’t be pleasant either, but I’ll take what I can get.

I’ll still wish you the best but I’ll never go there again.
© Copyright 2018, Jodine Derena Butler & Poetry Out West. All Rights Reserved

Infidelity

Strangers breathing another line

moistened senses swoon left

of centre, another beautiful deity

picked and plucked, the lint

from bellybutton trails to dine.

feasting on saturated savoury tarts, yet

scented saffron dies in lent

cast adrift, torn, a lurid net.

Christian monogamists wrestle the Nile

flooded.  sinners and breeders find

auspicious encounters satisfying Yin

© 2009 Jodine Derena Butler.  All Rights Reserved

Fall From Grace

When I turn my back
on love
I fall from grace
face first
down the slippery slope
off the straight & narrow

I am a Fool
for taking that first step
blindly, like the child I am
my wide grin becomes me
& my pearly whites flash
brief moments of pure brilliance

I lose sight of love
& for a split second
I am left winded
clutching at straws
that seem to stick to me
like bidibids

Once again I am chastened
all that I have become
hangs on one long bated breath
my fingertips trace the outline
of your stoic shadow
I watch you fade to black, petrified

© Copyright 2009 Jodine Derena Butler.  All Rights Reserved

I Found My Heart

 

I found my heart
on the borderline
of too late
just in time;
a fine lined
delicate box
inlaid with
criss-crossed
tongue and groove
timber framed
and paper thin –
(such was the state it was in)
I found my heart
shaped box
tucked away
under the debris;
no recognition
of her guild
thick-skin scarred
tiny cracks
intricate and interlaced
weather worn
like washed up
driftwood
I found my heart
a mantle piece
and set it
alongside a glass
vase filled
with floral Oriental’s
her lip sealed
tightly shut
innocence and sin
full trust
representative of love
anaesthetized by pain
I found my heart
magnified by you
and your telescope
my vision opaque
like liquid amber
in silver teardrop earrings;
in remembrance of
friendships once
lost to train wrecks
a heart shaped
box filled with
precious memories
is where I found my heart
in all her glory –
thinking of you

© Copyright 2009 Jodine Derena Butler.  All Rights Reserved

First Published, Live Lines, volume 4, Anthology, 2011,  ISBN: 11787767, Poetry Live, http://www.poetrylive.co.nz/live-lines.html

Sheep and Mosquitos 

Sheep follow
one, after the other
two, blind to see
the fence was an imaginary
escape route to nowhere

in particular –

juxtaposed with mosquito
banter on migration to a
carbon dioxide induced
acid trip

A palpable end
to an otherwise
paltry existance
for those not otherwise
engaged in slumber.

Blind and blood thirsty,
rhetoric is
not lost – who pulls
the shrouded woollen
scarf across their eye’s?

Semi clothed in
parachutes, attired
belligerence and
artificial libido,
comfort wrapped

as if –

fences don’t exist.
Premature collisions
run roughshod
over ruminating
premarital cliffs

sheep follow
one, after the other,
the blind leading the blind
relentless in pursuit
of happiness

a pantomime of
mosquitos dance,
while I endure
a never ending
kaleidoscope of noise

© 2009 Jodine Derena Butler.  All Rights Reserved