‘Newborn Nightmare’ by Photographer Wojceich Zwolinski – Cambion Art
I wish you could see me but more crucial that you could see yourself
I loved you more than anyone but you gave me nothing to hold on to
or stop making nonsense some sort of sabotage
pandering to your paranoia – I preferred your sweet smile
remembering laughter when you really meant it
everything on our own terms not needing anyone or anything
your eyes meeting mine discarded clothes strewn about the place
you are all I see, nothings changed; my heart is still beating for you
wishing we were naked in our secret place, playing
with each others present tense, feeling everything we’ve lost
so we can find love again. I wish I could be happy in the madness
doing all the things you wanted me to
this something is not what I want no matter how much I keep thinking
you are everything and more because I could never love another and look past
history is so different this time, I can’t let you go when that first kiss was love
I am breaking down in my darkness my world running after my memory of you
I wish you would pick me up and cradle me in your warm arms because I’m so tired
let those thoughts go from my mouth; taste your beautiful lips
I want to take it all wrap myself around and breathe you in
I dont want to waste a minute wasting time waiting for you to rise
I wish you would walk away from those liars and tell me you love me
time wondering if it’s too late watching everyone take a deep breath
I wish I never met you but I want to see you one last night
you and all your misbehaving hoping it’s alright – but it won’t be
there is nothing worse than watching a man with his demons
and love die.
© Copyright 2016, Jodine Derena Butler & Poetry Out West. All Rights Reserved
Wow, I can relate to this in the present time of my life. I feel as though I should let go, I think I can now. Thank you for that!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thankyou. I’m glad you understand. Take care 🙂
LikeLike
Pingback: 5 lessons on modern love from the movie, HER – redesign life
Nicely written, as I was reading this I thought I was the writer as it’s actually how my situation is after many years. Life gets tough over the years of aging, wish I could go back to the beginning again and relive them, those were the happiest days of my life.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Writing them down helps me. This poem initially stopped at ‘alright’ but I felt compelled to add the last two lines, almost like a slap in the face to wake me up. I dunno if I should have added them or not…
LikeLiked by 1 person
No, I think those last lines are a perfect way of ending the poem.
LikeLiked by 1 person